THE GARGOYLE AND THE DOVE

Day in and day out, a pious dove perches on the nose of a gargoyle,
so grotesque, only a mother could love.

She falls in love with him,
and pleads: “Come fly away with me.”
“I can’t he replies, I have responsibilities.”

“You have powerful wings
lying dormant at your sides,
and you’ve never had much fun,
loyal to everyone but yourself.”

A veteran of the carnage of the Crusades
he volunteered to protect Francis of Asissi
on his journey to meet the Sultan of Egypt.

He journeyed across hot Sahara sands,
passed Pyramids with sarcophagi
covered in amber and burnished mother of pearl.

Francis brought a peace inside his soul,
offering all the bells and whistles of the Church:
transubstantiation, with incense, wine and wafers.

Franciscan hagiography reports
Francis jumped into a burning fire
and survived unscathed
to prove the veracity of the Gospels.

Francis failed to convert the Sultan
who listened to him for two days,
replying: “La Moshkelah” (“You can kiss my fat ass.”)

As a reward for serving in the Pope’s army
he was transformed into a gargoyle
to ward off evil spirits at his favorite cathedral.

The Pope pronounced Francis the Patron Saint of Animals,
allowing him the freedom
to enter the soul of any animal, including the dove.